Choose Your Own Adventure

I was never a fan of the Choose Your Own Adventure books when I was a kid, and I'm really not a fan of choosing my own adventure in life when the path can lead me to death faster. As many reading this know, the surgeon's appointment didn't go as expected, and the last 2 weeks have been pretty eventfully uneventful. For those that don't know, I'll try to bring you up to speed. 

I was referred to my surgeon under our incorrect assumption I had a new tumour in my right frontal lobe based upon my November 2017 scan. When my January scan didn't come out right my Oncologist decided to see what my surgeon could make of my previous scans and situation. Well, imagine my surprise when he said there is no second tumour, just the original in my right temporal lobe growing again. That's a bittersweet thing to hear. "So yeah there's only 1 tumour, not 2, unfortunately, that 1 tumour is growing." Crap. 

However, because I've had surgery at that site before and as the surgeon said, "you're eating, walking, talking, and otherwise functioning well, it's not going to benefit you to remove it now. It could do more harm than good". And so he sent me back to the cancer centre. Little did I know upon returning to the cancer centre that I'd be transferred from the hands of my radiation oncology team to the medical oncology team, or chemotherapy team. Apparently, since radiation was completed in 2014 my Doctor won't perform radiation anytime soon. 

I've made my intentions known for quite some time that I am not interested in chemo for several reasons, but I decided to be a big girl and hear them out, and so I met my new Medical Oncology team. They all seem very nice, and get this: because I'm walking, talking, eating, and otherwise functioning well, it's not going to benefit me to undergo chemo. And yes, even though I did not and do not want chemotherapy, it's rather frustrating to be told all 3 options of care are currently off the table while I have this tumour growing in my head. 

I'm just going to have to let it grow some more until it starts to affect me more. I'm not sure if I'm more frustrated at that, or just the situation of having a tumour in my head that is slowly killing me. This isn't something I can escape, but hopefully, I choose the right adventure, because if I choose the wrong adventure I could end up trapped INSIDE UFO 54-40. For now, I wait for my next MRI which I've been told will be in 2 months time so that they can compare the scans from January to get an idea of how fast it may be growing. I guess at that point we'll have another chat. 

Below is a photo of my tumour, as most know him, Horatio, he is circled in yellow. Until next time. 

~T